Hairy Legs

I have not shaved my legs in 3 months and counting. This all started as a social experiment of sorts. See, I majored in Sociology and Psychology in college and sometimes feel compelled to challenge social norms and expectations. I once told a Soc. professor that I was late for class because “time is a social construct created to oppress me.” Yes, I really said it out loud. Hey, it was better than when I told a different professor I was late because of “traffic” when I was quite sure he saw me from the window as I walked across the street from my dorm room.

But I digress. This time I decided to see how long I could go without shaving my legs. I decided that doing it in the winter would not be fair because I could just wear pants. Besides, this winter I also had an excuse not to shave because shaving while pregnant requires an act of God. No, sir! I would not take the easy way out. I was going to really see what kind of reaction I would illicit from people and how I would really feel if I just went full force during spring and summer with hairy legs. If the comedienne Mo’Nique could do it then so could I.

Let me first explain that while I am not Sasquatch and could not survive in the frozen Tundra without a jacket, I am a fairly hairy girl. (Unlike my mother who has naturally has like no body hair- not even underarm hair. How is that even possible and why didn’t I get that gene?) This is a plus and a minus. The minus is pretty simple – shaving. I have been shaving my legs since junior high. I don’t shave my arms (I did once when I was 8, but that was just a rookie mistake.) Where I grew up hair is not a problem. There is apparently a rumor that we are wild in bed. I did not start it, but it makes getting date pretty easy. I've heard more than one guy try to pick a girl up with some variation of the line, “Wow, you have a lot of hair on your arm.” Believe me; I could not have made that up.

I was, however, determined to prove that I could shun the hairless American standard of beauty. I would prove that I am a self-assured woman who plays by her own rules. I figured it couldn’t be that hard. For one, I am happily married to a man who could care less if I shave or not. Being marries also eliminated any fear of turning off possible suitors. Besides, even if I were single, I have seen the men around here and they ain’t so hot anyway. Secondly, I am usually so self-centered that I am oblivious to what other people are thinking anyway.

Except for point number one I was totally WRONG! I will confess I am weak and have shaved at least twice since beginning this project. One of those times was right before reaching my due date. I told myself that it had to be done. I wanted to feel like a woman. As if there is anything more womanly than giving birth. I just needed an excuse. The truth is being around other women with their baby-butt smooth legs made me beyond self-conscious. I found myself fidgeting, hiding, making excuses to people I am not sure were even looking. I think I may have even actually run down the street once. I started wearing jewelry (which I haven’t done since high school) to distract and draw peoples attention upward.

I was mortified by my own behavior. How could I be this shallow? I determined that I was going to have to pull it together. I decided that this experiment would have to continue until I could be comfortable in a group of people with my hairy stems showing. Then one day I was walking and saw a group of women lunching. I decided to suck it up and walk past. I did and it felt good. I felt like I had just given them a huge middle finger. I sauntered and the rebel in me said, “Screw you. I don’t care what you think!” I have not shaved since.

It has not been easy and I am glad that summer is coming to a close because I am going to be done with this soon. Does this mean I will shave my legs when for first leaf drops this fall? I don’t know, but I know if I do it will be because I want to, not because I think I should.