Will Work For Guilt

That is what my mother has figured out. She can get me to do almost anything by saying something like, "I just wish someone would help me," or "You are the only one I can count on." Sadly it works virtually every time. Most recently she got me to put up a glass tile backsplash in her kitchen. It looks really good and I am proud to say that I pretty much did it all by myself. (She did wipe off the excess grout and clean up the counters at the end.)

When my father came and told me I did a good job I poked my chest out a little with pride. I joked that the only reason I keep doing things for them is so that I can stay the favorite. (Not like the competition is so stiff.) I honestly just want my parents to enjoy retirement and the home that they live in. They have worked really long and hard to give my siblings and I better life and if I can install a new backsplash that she bought I will. (They brainwashed me so well. I encourage all parents to start it early. I already tell my son, "Nobody loves you like Mommy!")

My mother was so excited about not having to pay for a professional to come do the work, but I had to tell her that I cost way more than a professional if she thought about it. She paid for my elementary and junior high private school education. Clothes for me to wear when I went to public high school and a private Catholic college education complete with  out of state fees because I was not going to give up the chance to live on my own at age 17. She and Daddy bought my first car and put the down payment and final 2 payments on my current car. They paid for my wedding, helped with closing costs on our current home, bought both baby cribs and convertible bed pieces and have given me access to her Amex Platinum Card. I had to let her know that she may have by far the most expensive "glass" backsplash in the history of home renovations.

This is not to say that I don't work hard for my privileges. I put up with her meddling and make myself available despite the inconvenience it sometimes causes. The backsplash is just the beginning. No sooner than the last bit of grout was wiped off did she decide that I should resurface her counters this Sunday. She also dropped some hints about puttying the holes in wall where a shelf used to be. It is only a matter of time before she begins to question whether the cabinets would look better in a lighter stain.

I may have created a monster. You would think I am trying to get a show on HGTV! What would my show be called - "Sucker For Hire", "Mommy Dearest Renovations", "Guilt Trip". The possibilities are pretty endless, but, seriously, I am going to have to draw the line at jobs involving power tools.