Baby Face

LoLo and Suga had a pretty action packed weekend with birthday parties on both Saturday and Sunday. I missed the first party because Mallow thankfully wanted a little "auntie time". (Let's just take a moment to thank God for people who call and ask to babysit. You have a special seat in heaven.) The second party was at a cute kids place with glow in the dark bounce castles and balls and stuff. While I was there struggling to make small talk with people that only see once every few years despite having grown up together I realized something that made me both smile and cringe.

My kids were WAY cuter than there kids! To be fair, the birthday girl was pretty cute. Thank God she looks like her dad. (The dad may be my friend, but trust me when I say that I am not biased against the mother, but with those eyebrows- despite plucking-, the weird beady eyes and pointy face, she is just not the beauty pageant type.) Her cousins, however, were not so lucky. I expected one of them to be kind of hard up because her mother was never "a looker" if you know what I mean, but the rest of his siblings are pretty attractive. Which left me to question what happened and what am I supposed to say when they bring up cuteness?

The whole situation reminds me of back when I worked in retail this girl wanted to make a sale so badly that she just raved to the customer about how beautiful her baby was and called all the other associates to come over and rave about the baby. So much so, that she called me from the back room to chime in. I come out and look under the stroller hood to see what was to this very day the UGLIEST scrunch face hairy baby I have ever seen in my life. All I could do was something like, "Wow, that is a baby," and retreat back to the back. What she did was not fair to that woman. She made her and her baby into a spectacle and I would never want to do something like that to someone. A mother knows what her baby looks like. They know if they meet cultural standards of beauty or have "a face only a mother could love".

Let me be clear about one thing. I have friends with really cute kids. Jigga and Chyna have really cute girls. JJ Santana and Q-Diva have the most adorable nephews and my sisters kids were some of the most beautiful people I have ever seen. Seattle's kids look like they could have been ordered from a catalog. (I would buy one) While I have definite Mommy bias, I am also pretty realistic about what my kids look like. I notice every little flaw because I am always watching them. I know every mark scar, mannerism, and weird feature. I love all their quirks, but I know that they are not little perfect Ken and Barbie people. I know my LoLo has one eye that squints when he smiles and that Suga has thumb toe. Hey, I need to be able to take it as good as I give it and my kids are no exception.

In situations like the one at the mall and at the party that I was at this weekend, I see so many people lying to parents that I am also pretty skeptical of the compliments that I get from other people. I know some people subscribe to the "all babies are cute" school of thought. I am not one of those people.(Don't make that face. I need a realistic understanding of what I am working with. It in no way changes my love for them, but pretending like you are young Brad Pitt when you are more Seth Rogan is not my style. They are both cute and each has his place, but they are not the same.) With that said, I have come to the conclusion that LoLo and Suga are in fact very cute little people.

That brings me back to the party. I was at a loss for how to respond when conversations went like this:

Me: Hey, girl
Them: Hey, how are you? I can't believe how big he is now. He is so handsome.
Me: Oh, thank you.
Them: That is my baby over there.
Me: Yeah. I saw her. How old is she now?
Them: She is 4. Can you believe it?
Me: She is tall...What else have you been up to?
Them: Not much. Chasing behind them. I saw your little girl, too. She is adorable. That is my son over there.
Me: Oh. I see he likes basketball. How old is he?
Them: 3.
Me: Wow. They are close. I don't know how you do it. I will see you later. I think LoLo has to go potty.

He didn't. I just needed to get out of there. I know what she is thinking. She wants to know why I have not commented on her child's looks. The thing is, I don't think it is beneficial to lie and pretend the kid is cute, but I see no reason to be a jerk and insult someone else's child. I would be devastated if someone did that to me. Even I am not that bad and who knows, they could grow out of it and turn out to be BEAUTIFUL. In the meantime the question is what do you do when you see an ugly baby? I choose the duck and cover. I think it may have worked.

Like that momm my love for my kids is unconditional and I will think they are the most beautiful people in the room no matter what happens, but I will say that it feels good to see the look on other peoples faces when they realize it too.