Best Bad Day Ever

Last night I told myself that it did not matter if I left my phone downstairs because I would just get up when Husband's alarm went off in the morning. It will be better that way considering his alarm goes of 15 minutes ahead of mine anyway. It will be fine.

That is SO not how it happened this morning.I vaguely remember Husband's alarm. Which is saying a lot considering the ridiculously loud and blood curdling tone he chose. I must have done the thing where I get lost in my thoughts and eventually drift back to sleep because the next thing that I remember is the sound of birds. This should have been a red flag because the birds by our house do not start chirping until about 7 AM, but somehow that sound did not register. What I did notice is that husband and I raised from our pillows and sat up at the same and mirrored each others "cat" stretch (his standing, mine done while still sitting in bed). As I was marveling at how surreal and synchronized we were, husband broke the stretch and the silence with "Oh, snap! It is 6:50." WHAT! NNNOOOO!

I am supposed to be up by 6:15 at the latest if there is any hope of getting my daughter to Grandparent Daycare, my son to school, and myself to work at the appropriate times. I somehow managed to pull it together enough to get my son to school only 5 minutes late, but in order to do that I had to pass my parents house and take Suga to school with me carrying the some random phone charger that she found and I was too tired to fight away from her. As I wrestle her back into her seat, I realize I masquerading as a single person because I am sans wedding ring. I figure it is not a big deal since I live around the corner from my parents and decide that since I have to double back to drop off the baby I will stop by home and get the ring and whatever else I had forgotten.

As I pull out the school parking lot, I get a frantic call from my mother. I was late and not answering the phone, so she had gotten dressed and was on her way to my house because clearly something had happened. (She thought I may have fallen down the stairs, to be more specific) I let her know that I was fine and on my way. When I arrived, the first thing she said is, "What is that sticking out of your brassiere?" (Yes. She really does talk like that and she still uses the term dungarees.) I tell her it is Suga Booga's prescription and that I put it there to make sure I don't forget to give it to her. The drop of goes fairly well and I proceed home to resume life as a married woman.

I get home and get my ring, grab my unfinished VitaminWater and see something fall. What was that? Oh, nothing. Just Suga's prescription. ARGH! Really? Is it really going to be this kind of day? Every time I think that I have turned a corner on this morning something else happens. I call my parents on my way out to let them know I will be leaving the prescription in the mailbox. As I approach the door I notice that the alarm timer is on and I have 6 seconds and counting to leave before I set off the alarm. I hurry out, sit in the car and think, "You got this!" As I pull up to the house she is waiting outside and I give the paper directly to my mother. We realize Husband has the Flexcards and just hope for the best at the pharmacy.

I think that everything will be smooth sailing from here on out, right? Not quite. I have NO gas. I have been driving with the gas light on this whole and time and decide that I should rectify this situation before getting onto the highway. As I pump my gas, I realize that I should call work, which makes me question where my parking badge/ key card is. I'll give you three guesses, but if you know me well enough you will only need one. It is at HOME, in my gym bag. I have to go get it because the last time I forgot my card the lady looked like she was going to flip on me and I have cramps and am not going to react well to that today. (OH...Did I forget to mention that I started that week and feel like there are twisted pliers clutching my abdomen from the inside?) I go to call work and CANNOT find my cell phone. This is ridiculous because I have been in the car and near the car this whole time. How do you loose a cell phone in a Jetta? There is not enough space to loose a thought in a Jetta.

I drive out to the house for the second time, now mumbling to myself about the phone. I get my card with no hassle. As I get ready to drive off, I find the phone and call. Just as I am about to have my victory moment I remember, "Dag nab it, where is my lunch? In the house...I would rather eat dirt than go back into this house another time." With that I open the garage door and roll on to the store because I have decided that this is the last day I drive without an earpiece.

It takes two stores but I find an earpiece. As I open the package, I realize that it has a cord and I have dropped the adapter that fits in my phone somewhere in the car when I popped the container open. I search frantically for it in my hot car. When I do find it, I realize that everyone is at work and there is no point to having it now because there is nobody to talk to. Traffic was crazy. Was EVERYONE late today? I was moving, but my speedometer still said 0. I did not even know that was possible. I got off to take the street. The rest of my commute went pretty well. I got to work and other than some random questions and few assignments things were looking good. I knew today was not going to be a bad day.

Then AAAHHHHHH!! Shooting pain! I just bent back the nail on my left index finger and cracked it at the pink meet. Yup, that is blood. I go get ice and wash it out. I find a band aid and try to apply an adequate amount of pressure. It is only 10:30 in the morning.

I really want today to be a good day. I am sure that it could be. I decide to pull a Jesse Jackson and Keep Hope Alive, but I will admit that I am starting to wonder if things are just going to keep happening until I give up on today. I should be miserable, but I am just not. I don't get that feeling from this day. I also have to admit that I am starting to feel a little like Job. Did God and the devil have a talk about testing me. That is the only thing that both makes sense to me right now, while making me feel a lot better about this troubling chain of events. So I have made up my mind.

This is the day the Lord has made and I will rejoice and be glad in it - no matter what. (I added that last part.)