Snack Attack

Men and women think differently. Everyone knows that. What defies logic is how surprised and annoyed I am every time Husband does something that to me just does not make sense.

There are some behaviors that are uniquely male (like peeing standing up) and while this one is, as I am sure, not a "man thing" per se, it is something that I see them do far more often than women. I did what most women do and married a man very much like my father. Unlike some of my friends, I did it on purpose - not because I thought he was perfect, but because there are things that I genuinely like about my Daddy and after dating more people than I care to count, I realized that I my personality was best suited to a man just like "dear old Dad". Although, Husband is similar, he does have his own quirks and is most definitely a man with fewer issues. Thank God.

They do have one similar quality I would like to highlight because it really ruffled my feathers this weekend. It is a quality they share with my sister's crazy ex-husband (one of the few besides genitalia) and many of my friend's boyfriends, husbands, and exes. It is not something dangerous or even that major, but there are times when it is just a pisser offer.

When I, as a woman, go to the store, I buy things for everyone. I buy the snacks that everyone likes. I either buy chips that we all can share or I buy individual treats. For example, I found Pringles on sale and bought the following flavors (BOGO): Salt and Vinegar, BBQ, Sour Cream and Onion, and plain. He one the other hand went to the store a couple days ago (after finishing the last of the chips, of which I only got a handful) and came back with Dill Pickle. WHAT!?! I don't want to eat pickle chips.

Before I had a meltdown, I decided to give him the benefit of the doubt and check the pantry for something that he may have bought with me in mind. Do you know what I found? NOTHING. Not even a bag of tortilla chips. It reminded me of my parents and lets be frank. It is rarely I good thing to make your wife feel like she is becoming her mother. My mother's constant peeve is about bread. She says that my father goes to the store and buys bread in flavors that she does not eat or want to eat and that when she then goes to the store and buys wheat bread, he eats all of "her" bread first, leaving her with no bread and never thinks to replace it. Chyna has a similar story about her husband and the list goes on and on. 

I know that we think differently and that opposites attract and all that crap, but is is really that hard to consider someone else when walking down the aisle. This may be as bad as the time he came home with Tomato Basil chips. I don't want spaghetti sauce on my chips. If you want to experiment that is fine, but at least have a back up plan. My visceral reaction to his purchase was about to bring new meaning to the words "Snack Attack".

I mean, really, people have been shanked for less.