Bad Boys

When I went to work this Saturday I saw a guy who reminded me so much of the guys I used to date. He had the piercings, the tats, and was exactly where I thought they would end up...REHAB. As I resisted the countertransference that had me wanting to tell him what his real problem was I could not help but be proud of myself for taking my own advice. (I once told my niece this nugget of wisdom, but I don't think she was listening.) Simply put, I come from a long line of women with questionable taste in men, the important thing to remember is to get it together before you marry one. I did that. Don't get me wrong, Husband totally has the bad boy edge, but he got himself together with no help from me.

I know that many girls date the bad boy and want to change him. They want to be the one whose love makes him realize the error of his ways and heal the hurt little boy inside. I also understand how my being a therapist would lead people to believe I would be one of those girls, but I assure you that I was not. I dated bad boys with no intention of trying to change them. I did it because I loved the life and the excitement and the drama. It was like being Bipolar without the need for meds.

Then one day, I woke up and knew that I had had enough. I wanted to finally "Do Better" and date someone whose job involved paying into Social Security and whose tattoos would not lead to police questioning. I was over the drama and the "ride or die" lifestyle no longer appealed to me. I did not want to help pay fines, accept collect calls or keep checking the side view mirror as we drove. I was still down for the hustle mentality, but my love of the hustle had passed. On a side note, I recently told LoLo to repeat after me - no neck tattoos. Yes, he is for, but I figure it is like the don't do drugs talk. It is never too early.

That is why it gave me such great satisfaction when after I complimented the patient on being seeming to in a better head space and no longer giving me looks that could kill and he replied with, "Naw, I was probably just checking you out," that I was no longer in a place that called for a "Thanks, Boo".

It kind of made me shiver and throw up in my mouth, but I redirected and kept the group focused all while giving myself a pat on the back in my head.

Yay, me!