Better Day

I got to go to see my sweet boy sing with his class this morning, so today was automatically going to be a better day.

I also had a better day at work. Don't get me wrong, I still want to run screaming from the building, but I said a few things today that I thought might make you laugh. These are things that I really say at work.

Nobody is going to lick it, so please don't put salt and pepper in your hair.
Cake is not a requirement; it is a privilege.
I hope you are not stuck under that chair.
Do not crawl on the table.
You all seem to have a booger fascination.
Do not pick things out of the trash to play with.
I will not give you scissors to cut a can.

And I thought I said strange things at home.